Fun…

How do you have fun? When do you have fun? Do you have enough fun? These are questions I’ve been asking myself for a little while. I believe fun must be part of my life so that I can get the most of life. For the last few months I have been seriously questioning myself about whether I’m having any or enough fun. Why? Because I look around and I see others having fun and I wonder if I’m doing something wrong.

This blog isn’t meant to be negative, although, you might wonder considering how I started. It’s a selection of my musings over the last few months and initially I didn’t consider writing a blog about it. I thought it sounded like a bit of a strange topic. But the more it entered my mind the more I wondered if others have these questions.

On Friday afternoon I was visiting with my uncle. He’s lived a good, long life and I think it’s been a fun life. He’s travelled many areas of the world, has a lot of friends, has always been active, and generally enjoyed himself. Of course there were tough times, everyone has them, but as he talks about the past it’s usually with a smile and laughter. We talked about all sorts of things on Friday including skunks, the chaos of the Middle East, and my son. Honestly, we talked about many other things as well, but those three topics were “fun”. Now, why would I say talking about the Middle East is fun? Well, my uncle keeps abreast of everything happening in the world and like me, loves hearing a good presentation of the news. So, yes, it was fun for me to have a conversation with someone who has similar views and gives me additional insight into what is happening and how it is being discussed. The topic isn’t the fun. The fun is being able to have an animated conversation with someone I love and admire. Sometimes it’s just being able to spend the time together. I don’t believe fun has to always be “easy and light”. Sometimes fun can be quiet enjoyment. Sometimes it comes from feeling comfortable in the situation or environment, even if the discussion is a difficult one. Anyway, that’s my explanation about part of our visit. The other subjects I highlighted, skunks and my son, were filled with laughter, learning, and joy.

So, skunks. I was out for a walk early this past week and saw an animal pass in front of me crossing the road. When I put a flashlight on it I clearly saw the stripe of white down its back. I quickly made a wide arc around his path. My uncle was telling me about years ago catching skunks in a live trap intended for raccoons. [I just realized I don’t know if any raccoons were ever caught!] He told me about how he relocated them to an area outside of the town and how they don’t want to be smelly anymore than we want them to be! We laughed and joked about the catching and transporting and how I’ve become VERY cautious walking around the village now that I know they live nearby. As for the conversation we had about my son, it was fun to talk about the differences in generations and of course, talking about my son always makes me joyful. My uncle and aunt weren’t blessed with children, but they had us and all of our cousins as “fill ins” and he takes great interest in what interests my son and his girlfriend. Anyway, without intending to, we got around to the topic of fun. My uncle said my son loves to have fun. He goes to concerts and travels and likes Vegas (a little too much!). My uncle thought it strange that he would be putting this emphasis on fun at this stage in his life. We talked about how it’s so different from earlier generations. There was a general approach: work hard, build a life, build a family, and THEN you can go have fun. It echoed something I’ve been thinking for a while. I’ve been looking forward to retirement to do those things that are the most enjoyable. “Once I don’t work long days”, “after I’m done working full time”, “when I can focus on me and what I want”, have all been refrains that have permeated my thoughts in the last year. To come back to my son, is it really wrong that he wants to get as much out of life as he can and when he can? It’s definitely a different path than mine or my uncle’s, but if he is responsible about it, why not? Haven’t we been given this life to celebrate it?

When I first decided to write this blog, I was thinking of my friends who seem to have lots of fun in their lives. I have one friend who is heavily involved in her community and the activities that take place. She’s always volunteering or attending an event, engaged with the people and loving every minute of it. I look at her with so much admiration and a bit of envy until I remember that when my son was young, I was that person, too. She’s still there and I’m in a different space now. Another friend seems to focus on physical activity. She and/or her children are constantly competing or traveling for sports events. And she seems to thrive on it, with the support of her whole family. Her husband is always there at her side, cheering her on. You can practically feel the energy pumping off her! Another friend loves to travel with her husband. They’re on the road “RVing” all summer and then off to the beaches over the winter. Her fun is warm temperatures, good food, excellent entertainment, and relaxation. She comes back rejuvenated and honestly looking forward to retirement so that she doesn’t have to come back to emails and a pile of work!

I made a decision that I was going to make time for fun. Fun for me can be as simple as enjoying a summer afternoon in my pool. With good weather, sun-warmed water, and the joy of knowing it’s mine, I really enjoy that time. It can be as “complicated” as a trip to a loved destination like Ireland. It has to be planned and booked and time away has to be navigated. And what is there in between? Well, golf games with my golf partner during the season is a great time always, even when my score is ugly. Visits with my uncle, as I described, can be wonderful fun. Something as easy as a call with my son can be filled with laughter and fun. Once I started writing this out I realized I have been making time for fun. Maybe the problem isn’t the time set aside for fun but recognizing that I do enjoy my life. I do make time for fun times and fun events. Maybe it’s a reminder that I’m lucky enough to have an appreciation for so much in my life already and that a lot of those times are fun.

Those that know me might wonder about the fact I haven’t spoken of my mom in this blog. Well, it’s because I wanted to end by mentioning the fun I have with her. This past weekend I took her to a concert in her city. It was great music and full audience participation. She couldn’t get over how the crowd sang along and knew all the songs! It was a night when my face did not stop smiling! And that’s only the most recent fun time with my mom. We have many occasions that are filled with enjoyment. Whether it’s going to the garden centre at the beginning of the season or attending an old fashioned Christmas bazaar it’s time spent with someone special and it’s absolutely fun!

Fun can be so many different things to me. I was driving along a rural road and off to one side I saw two horses. They were standing on either side of a fence. Now, I know there had to be a person nearby, but it honestly looked like they were leaning against a fence rail having a chat; one inside the paddock and one outside. It brought such a grin to my face! A Jimmy Buffet song came on in my car and I cranked the volume and sang along at the top of my lungs! So much fun! I’ve been letting my neighbours’ dogs out off and on this past week as they were away. The pups made me smile and laugh, especially when they decided they preferred the warmth of the couch and wouldn’t go out! But they definitely wanted snuggles! Since I don’t have my own pup anymore, I have to admit it’s been fun popping over and seeing them. Next week is Hallowe’en and I am so excited that I will be hosting my mom and my nieces. That will be so much fun as the village really goes all out for the occasion!

Those are just a few examples of where I find fun in my day. There are so many others from events that I attend to times at home when I turn up the music and dance around. Fun can be loud and exuberant or quiet and joy filled. It can be meaningful or silly. It can happen alone or with a few friends or a crowd. It’s up to me whether I find fun in my everyday life.

I feel like I must share the colours of my geraniums. They are still blooming and even the leaves have changed with the arrival of autumn.

While not a lot of fun to do, the outcome of shed cleaning brings a smile to my face. Fall is the perfect time of year for getting things tidied and “put to sleep” for the winter.

While visiting this past weekend, I noticed my mom had used a runner on her fireplace mantel. I liked the idea so much that I tried it in my living room. I think it looks great. [The candle is on a timer and lights up at night.]

I mentioned that changes were coming to the front of my house. Well, consider this part one. Next blog should have the complete new look! Loving it so far!